Carpe M’Fing Diem!

So today was one small step for man, one giant leap for JSP. Today I did something that I haven’t done since I was in the eighth grade. Today I asked a guy out (just to clarify, I asked a girl out in the eighth grade). I have been planning this since; oh I don’t know, Monday. I am not someone who you would call spontaneous. If given time to plan, I can be as impetuous as the next guy. So yeah, this was kinda a big deal for me. I definitely thought I would have been so much smoother than I actually was. I am pretty sure I sounded like I was speaking a mile a minute. Also, the phone call lasted less than like 2 minutes. I pretty much said hey how is it going, and then do you want to go to dinner on Tuesday night.  He said yes which is good. Of course once I was off the phone I was over thinking what I had just done. Did he say yes because he wanted to say yes or did he say yes because he felt obligated? I don’t know, I think I am just a huge spaz.

I think that I need to focus on the fact that it is just dinner and that is all. I am gonna be leaving Madison in a little over two months. I think that is partially why I am acting so out of character. Knowing that I could go out of my comfort zone without being completely vulnerable I think allowed me to do this. Also, I am not like completely in love with the guy that I asked out. I think he is way cute and fun but we have only hung out twice. The thing is I kinda went out of order in terms of the whole going on a date and then getting to “know” each other.  I can say one thing; he is a really good kisser. So we will see how things go on Tuesday. Obviously I will post about the whole thing; unless it goes horribly and I am too busy boozing away the sadness.

Watching: Brothers and Sisters

Heyyyyy Brother.

So my brother will be arriving in Madison in about 20 minutes. He is here for my graduation, which is on Sunday. I haven’t really felt like I was graduating until my bro called when he landed in Milwaukee. I can’t believe that it is actually here. I picked up my cap and gown today with Gina and Sara and it was surprisingly ordinary. For some reason I feel like these events should be happening with more poignancy. Like when I got my cap and gown, the Chancellor should have been there to bestow upon me the sacred crimson and white tassel rather than some random dude who yelled, “Joel Pessermin.”

Thank God that today I feel relatively healthy compared to the last week. I only had to take three Advil rather than the blitzkrieg of Tylenol Cold and Flu, Dayquil and horse tranquilizers (guess which one I didn’t actually take, you’d be surprised). Tonight I think we are just gonna lay low and grab some dinner, but tomorrow will be a glorious day that will be remembered for ages; tomorrow is Terrace Thursday. Now I know that that probably doesn’t mean much to most of you but trust me when I say that if 20 years from now I was asked to sum up my college experience in one moment I would say Terrace Thursday. I should clarify that tomorrow is the 2^nd annual Terrace Thursday, the first one occurring last year of course. This was the day that the beer ran like water from the taps. I don’t know how much we all drank but it ended with Tal dancing in the fountain in Library Mall and Gina puking in her bathroom, demanding an audience. I can’t really remember if I did anything that was of note but come on; it’s me. So yeah tomorrow will be off the heezy.

Artist: Death Cab for Cutie

Charles II Was Straight Up Pimpin!

So I should totally be writing my History take-home right now but I would rather blog about nothing in particular. So my lab had our Senior dinner this past Thursday and it was surprisingly more bearable than I was expecting. DG took us to a restaurant that is best described as an Olive Garden without those heinous TV commercials. Have you seen those commercials? There is one where a woman is standing, scanning the dining room and a hostess comes and asks her who she is looking for. The woman responds that she is looking for her date. The hostess asks what her date looks like and the woman says he has brown hair and his shoes are probably untied. Now I am sure you are as perplexed as the hostess and I on what kind of guy this attractive blonde woman is dating if he can’t tie his shoes? Well let me throw you a curveball; a child comes running up to the blonde woman yelling, “Mom!” Sure enough he has brown hair and his shoes are definitely untied. Damn you Olive Garden for tricking me! How could I have not figured out it was her son? But seriously, I freaking hate that shit. Back to our dinner, DG dropped mad cash on us. There were nine people total and in addition to our dinners she bought four appetizers and four desserts. The conversation was good; MadJ sat across from me so we carried on in private a fair amount of the time. Oh I almost forgot, I accidently invited DG to the gay bar…woops.

In other aspects of my life, we have entered finals week here at UW and I have a cold. I think I may have shocked my body too much working out the Monday after Mifflin. I am trying to recuperate before my brother gets here on Wednesday for my graduation. God knows he expects me to show him a good time and I won’t be able to if I am an incubus of viral plague (name that movie!). Even though I am under the weather I was able to make a showing on Thursday night by going out with the lab. There was drama drama drama. This tends to happen now that the five of us have hung out for the year. I got in trouble because my attention was focused on a kid from my psych class this semester. He and I talked for a fair amount of the night and I guess this wasn’t kosher with others in the group. The way I see it, everyone else was talking to other people so I don’t see why I should be reprimanded because I was hanging with someone outside of the lab. I understand that it was our last hurrah but I mean I was hanging with them for a good deal of time prior to my class friend showing up. Oh well everything was worked out in the end.

So I realized as I was writing this post, I don’t like to write the word f***. I have no problem saying it but for some reason typing makes it seem really intense. Like if I were to say, “God, I fucking hate Olive Garden commercials,” you would think that I find them to be worst thing in the world. In actuality I just find them to be really dumb and contrived. So yeah, I don’t think I will be typing the word f*** when I blog but rest assured I say it all the time in my daily life.

Artist: Daft Punk, crazy shit.

Remember to Breath

So I was going to title this blog entry, “The Best Way to Detoxify is to Retoxify”, but I think I have written enough entries about going out and having a great time. This past weekend was the annual Mifflin Street Block Party. I had a super great time with my friends and there are definitely stories that I will remember (surprisingly!) for the rest of my life. I won’t go into details because I want to write about something that has been bothering me for the past few weeks. I figure it was only a matter of time before I wrote the obligatory “graduation fears” post. I am sure everyone else who is graduating is freaking out as well but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel really really scared. The only life I have known for the past four years is about to be royally turned upside down. I am fortunate enough to have a family who is completely supportive of me taking the next year off before going to graduate school.

What I think is really bothering me is that I have just started to become the man who I want to be. It really hasn’t been till this year that I have started to feel comfortable in my own skin. When I look back on the past three years it is as if I am looking at three different Joels. I had no fucking idea who I was freshmen year but I don’t think anyone knows who they are in their first year. Gina affectionately refers to sophomore year as my “GAY year”. During this year I dabbled in all things stereotypically gay. All that I took from this year was a deep appreciation of Madonna and a unique set of “make-out” songs. (If you want to know what the songs are post a comment and I will reveal them. Trust me they are doozies.) Junior year was my hump year. I had just started working in a research lab and I was way busier than ever before. Also, my living situation was only made bearable by frequent excursions to Gina’s apartment and holing up in my roommate Kara’s room. I can honestly say that junior year blew major ass. I think that is why I made a concerted effort to make this year the best it could be and for the most part it has been.

I know it is childish but I don’t want things to change. I have met so many awesome people this year and deepened relationships with others. I can only hope that this summer will be one of the best ever. I am worried though because so many people I love are going to be leaving right after graduation. Even just thinking about my friends leaving makes my eyes water (Yeah, I know, I can be a little emotional). I know I have a readership of tens, (if that), but I would appreciate any advice with dealing with such an insane time.

Artist: Madonna, how apropos